I want spring! And summer!

But the weather is still rather like in autumn...
My bag had a flowery makeover.
It's time for me. When? When the spring finally comes!

Possibilities and People

Two key words in my career.

I am still very impressed with the personality tests I have discovered some time ago and described here. They are Myers-Briggs tests, based on Jung's typology. I did one test online and then one at work, and had a feedback session about it. It's amazing how much I can find out about myself - not as much I can learn who I am and "how" I am, as rather how much I can become self-aware about my personality and my preferences.
And it really works for me, because the tests and discussion help me to verbalize my thoughts and feeling about my-self, and understand what I may want and I may like in life and at work.
So, apparently my key to career - which in my case means job that brings joy - is People and Possibilities. And truly, without hesitation I would say that this is most probably true. Developing myself is something I just cannot stop doing, I feel like drowning, when I am not reaching higher. And I think it's my start-point, from which I will take off and share my passion, and help others to develop, too.
Oh well. Easy to say. Jobs are not growing on trees. But at least I have the basis, some knowledge, some tips, a slightly sketched picture...

Away

I haven't been here for a little while.
But it's good to be away from everyday life and world from time to time - even if it's just for three days. Feels very refreshing and gives a lot of energy. I cannot be more thankful to my beloved that he let me go alone for a bit :) I really needed a break and I am glad that it was a happy and fulfilling time.
And today - I am coming back!

And this is my sister's birthday cake:

Balloons

This is what I saw yesterday in the morning:


Invasion of colourful balloons on my desk :)

One of these days

Today is one of these terrible Mondays - I haven't slept enough, I had a very busy day at work, I spent an hour at the surgery just to find out that I have to repeat my blood test, and now I have a massive headache and stare for the x-teenth hour at the computer screen, because I have to write my essay.
On top of that, I am depressed because recently three lovely people from my work handed in their resignations, leaving for a better job... No more comments on the subject, I tried and I cannot find anything... I need connections, friends of friends, who know me and my value as an employee ;)
And on top of that I was on the phone with my Mum and hearing how tired and fed up she was, I got more depressed.
Okay, now I will try to write a couple of nice paragraphs about the Protestant Reformation :]

Tai chi

Today I had my first tai chi class. I did some tai chi before, as a part of other classes in the gym, but this one was fully and only about this martial art. We don't know yet if it would be put on the schedule, but guys who took part in this taster session with me looked pretty excited, so I guess there will be enough positive feedback to set up a regular class.
I found it quite difficult and I got a bit annoyed. I think my co-ordination needs a lot of work, but in the end this is one of the essential elements of tai chi, and this is one of the reasons I shall not give up before I really start. I think I should give it a try. The vision of 6-8 months of training before I get anywhere doesn't put me off at all ;P

Island

This is one of my favourite songs by Heather Nova. Hand on my heart - I don't know all her songs, she wrote so many of them! I have her albums, yet didn't have time to listen to everything properly... I guess it gets harder once you grow up and you are not a teenager anymore, who can just come back from school, do some homework and indulge into music or literature...

This is "Island". Version "live", so the quality is not perfect, but I hope you will like it:

And the story goes...

Thank you for your comments on the question and for all the thoughts you had about the story, but didn't put in here.
What is my opinion? Well, it's true that human beings are only human beings sometimes, and no-one lives without struggles. I think we learn about ourselves for our whole life and we cannot ever say: in this situation I would do this or that, because we just don't know it for sure until we face the situation...
More about religion - apparently the story was told on a theological conference and the same question was asked. One of the representatives of Church condemned the couple severely, and the other called him apparently a "fascist bastard"... What I am trying to say here is, I think, that Chrisitianity contains a huge variety of beliefs, worldviews and attitudes to tradition, scriptures and personal experience... It's not possible (and hardly ever was) to talk about Christianity like it is a monolithic religion, same for all its followers. I think that today this mixture is even more diverse than ever before, partly because in the late XX century people started choosing their personal experience, thoughts, interpretation, feelings over one shared tradition. I guess for someone from a diffeernt religious or cultural background it would be hard to embrace Christianity as a whole! I wish though it could re-unite one day, in its very basic fundaments. Probably that's way the spirit of Taizé community is so close to my heart.

I am!

Last year I wrote that I was having coaching sessions to develop some of my skills and improve my self-confidence... I really enjoyed this process and I found it so powerful and satisfying, that I decided to take part in coaching skills training to learn more about it.
As soon as I attended the training, I knew I would like to become a coach. This kind of mutual development, challenge and special relationship between the coach and the coachee is something I would love to be a part of... I would love to see people growing, overcoming difficulties and discovering their potential, and sharing their happiness.
Yesterday I had my coaching assessment. Quite stressful. I wasn't sure if I did well enough... But today I had a meeting and the feedback and - I passed, and from now on I am an accredited coach! I AM SO HAPPY :)

Here's a story

I heard it on my tutorial last weekend. It's short, although still a bit long to write down, so I will try to make it as brief as possible, keeping all the significant details in place.

So, a long time ago there was this young man and this young woman, who lived in one village, knew each other since childhood, and when they grew up they fell in love with each other. They were both Christians and they were waiting impatiently, in purity of their souls and bodies, for the day when they can afford to get married, live in their own house and have a loving family, so their life is fulfilled and happy.
One day the man received a letter from his uncle from a big town. The uncle wrote about a business he was starting and that he was sure he would be successful. And as he doesn't have any children himself, he would be delighted to work with his nephew, this young man. After giving this a bit of thought, the young man packs his stuff and goes to town, and his beloved woman stays in the village and waits for him to come back and marry her.
After some time she receives a letter from her beloved. He writes that the business indeed goes well, that he became rich and successful, and that he bought a beautiful house for them at the edge of the town. He asks his beloved woman to pack and come to join him in town, so they can finally get married and live happily together. The young woman packs her stuff and goes to town.
But at some point of her journey she sees a huge river - a deep one, running very fast. There is no bridge around, so it seems impossible to get on the other side. Then she notices a man with a boat, who offers her a ride on the other side. But his price is high: he demands her virginity. The woman is saddened and confused, because here she tries to get to the town to see her "only one", her future husband, for whom she was waiting so long... but if she doesn't "pay", she probably won't see her beloved ever again. So in the end she agrees and this way she lands on the other side of the river.
As she keeping walking to the town and she is quite close, she finds herself at the edge of a very big, dark and scary forest. She knows that the town lies just behind it, so all she needs to do to finally be with her beloved is to get through the forest. But there is this sign saying that the forest is dangerous and you won't survive there unless a guide helps you to go through. But there is no guide. Instead, a devil comes and offers the woman help in going through the forest, if she agrees to have sex with him. The woman is upset and hesitates, but finally agrees, as she realizes how close she is to her beloved, to her happiness and fulfilled life.
The devil helps the woman and there she is, standing at the edge of the town. She sees the beautiful house, the one her beloved described in the letter. She is filled with love and happiness that finally, after so much time and so many difficulties they will be together again, and they can live happily. She knocks at the door, but before that she decides she would tell him the truth about what happened during her journey, as she couldn't live in a lie. When the door opens and the woman tells her beloved what happened on the way, he... shuts the door in front of her face. He never spoke to her again and he never forgave her.
The end.

Now, the question... Were those two people, or maybe one of them (which one?), or none of them, good Christians? And why yes or why not?
The subject will continue :)

The sky is brighter

Sometimes it's the most obvious things that make us happy. And I guess that is why it's so hard to notice them.

Regret

Yesterday I was in a shop choosing some gifts for my mum and sister, when a girl standing nearby had an epilepsy attack. She was with her mother, and she fell straight into her arms. The woman started crying and shouting for help. Her voice was weak, sounded like she was ashamed to ask strangers for help in saving her daughter's life. Or maybe she was just shocked and panicked, and wasn't able to speak louder?
I literally felt my heart was squeezed with fear and sorrow.
Someone immediately called an ambulance (but when I was leaving the shop, the medical help was not there yet). One woman looked like she knew what should be done and she rushed to help. I brought one of the towels to put under girl's head, but there was nothing else I could do.
It was one of those moments when I deeply regretted I didn't use my potential to become someone more useful. At the end of the day, I could be saving people's lives... And instead, I do nothing significant or useful for others.
Those thoughts made me stronger in my determination to reach for a new challenge and change my job into something more inspiring and self-giving. I just hope I will have an opportunity to do it...